Kelly Brook Is Single. Jackpot.

Kelly Brook is single now after finding out that her Rugby player boyfriend was cheating on her. Wait. What? Is this guy insane? Did the other girls vagina dispense soft serve ice cream? Gold coins? Because that's the only way I could see someone cheating on the perfect Kelly Brook.
His loss will be my gain though, it's really time I settle down and make an honest woman out of Kelly.
When I die my greatest hope is that it will be after a life well lived, with someone I love, and my final days marked with dignity. Instead of going to hookers and crying because I can’t get an erection, which is what I do now.